Couldn’t Have Asked For Better Weather
Randy and I headed to the Cape this past weekend for one last summer hurrah. Our friend, Roy, was supposed to join us but he flew back to California as a result of his sister passing away (poor guy). Since we had a non-refundable room, we went anyway and recruiting some other friends to join us.
Chris and Pete were already going to be there. So Zach and Jeff shared our suite.
Before the good stuff, let’s get back to this suite. We reserved at the Black Pearl. I’d never stayed there but it always looked nice enough when I walked by. We reserved the Captain’s Suite which was on the top floor. It included a living room, bedroom, bathroom and private roof deck with panoramic views of Ptown and the harbor (of course, that didn’t stop other guests from climbing up one night).
I’d called and spoke with the owners the day before to tell them that there was a slight change in plans as a result of our friend passing away. Before hanging up, the owners told me to check-in to the guesthouse BEFORE going to the beach so that they could enjoy the afternoon without having to wait for me.
So, we arrived a little after noon and the freaking owner snapped at me “You’re early.”. I replied that I was instructed the day before that I was told to arrive early. He just repeated “Yeah, but you’re still early.” OK – strike one.
He brought us to our room and it was the most spacious I’ve probably stayed in in Provincetown, but it was typically Ptown tacky with white and yellow floral sheets, ugly carpeting, chipped paint on the walls, etc…
The guesthouse also boasted of a hot tub. The signs said it ran until 11PM so we got down there just after 10:30 hoping to enjoy the last 30 minutes…only to find that the owners had already turned it off. Randy called and they grumbled something about nobody using it that late normally and people making too much noise when they do. Bregudgingly, they did ultimately come over and turn it on. OK…strike two.
The next morning as we were floating out and about, the owner started questioning the fact that we had our friends with us (even ones that were NOT staying in the suite). In fact, it seemed that nearly every time we walked around the property, an owner would pop out and comment/complain. Obviously, that wasn’t the case. In fact, I don’t recall seeing them at all on Monday (the day we checked out). But on Saturday and Sunday, it really did feel like we were being spied on since they always managed to appear and say something. Not friendly somethings like “enjoying the weather? or “fun day at the beach?”…unpleasant stuff like “how many of you are staying here? or “we need you to move your car”.
The also advertised continental breakfast, which I’ve come to know in Ptown often means cereal, donuts, bagels and cream cheese, and, if lucky, some cut fruit. Oddly enough, they had bagels, but no cream cheese? WTF?
Also on Sunday, after taking our showers, one owner yelled up from downstairs because there was a leak in the unit below us. Yep, our tub was leaking so they had to put this caulking/sealant stuff over the crack in the tub (a leack that already existed and had been repaid at least once before). When we took our next shower there was this large bulbous mound to step on. OK…strike three.
Long story short…the property itself looks adorable on the outside. The room was typical Ptown and did the trick. But the owners were horrible at making their guests feels welcome. Maybe they’re exhausted at the end of a busy summer season. Even so, if you can’t handle this sort of business, then find something new. In the end, I would NOT stay here again.
However, everything else about the trip was great. You couldn’t have asked for better weather. The beach was beautiful, we saw two good shows (Dina Martina and Varla Jean Merman). We saw a few D-list celebrities on the streets (Lea Delaria and Kate Clinton), and had a great time with our friends (we also hung out with our friends Roger and Marin on Sunday night).
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Hey Karl! Have you seen “Lie Down With Dogs”? It kinda sums up Ptown guesthouse owners – they’re almost all dysfunctional, often substance-abusers (or, worse ‘recovering’), and I’ve yet to find a house that isn’t crappier than it looks on the website with at least one annoying flaw…and all this for only $300/night – woo hoo!! I’ll make my next foray at Mates – the place LOOKS good, so I’m hoping…shall remain nameless until I’ve seen it. Good to know I can scratch the Black Pearl off my list. Oh, correction – the Inn at Cook Street was LOVELY under its former gay male owners; I hear it’s now owned by lesbians, and I hear that they have maintained the standard and it’s still very nice, etc. – but seems more the place, given the ownership and location, etc., for a romantic quiet getaway than something like Mates (I’d feel a LITTLE awkward walking through the halls in gear with women owners…mostly as I think they’d burst out laughing (grin). Saw Varla when I was down, too – GREAT show! Did you see her on Project Runway last week – hilarious! If you ever get the chance, see Lea Delaria’s show – she’s actually VERY funny and, man, can she ever sing – I was skeptical, but I’m a convert, and she seems a really cool person, just chatting when barking on the street.
Big plus – whoever runs this blogsite FINALLY corrected the background color on the “email address” box, so it can be seen – yay!!
No cream cheese? The horror!!! I don’t know how you coped.
I did see Lie Down with Dogs…I’d forgotten about that film. So few are filmed in Ptown. the only other one I can recall is that Normal Mailer film with Ryan O’Neil.
Anyway, it’s true…it’s outrageous how much Ptown guesthouse keepers can charge. It was so much cheaper just 10 years ago before Ptown became land of the rich.
Lea Delaria does have an amazing voice. I always thought of her as a stand-up comic until I heard her sing about 10 years ago. Who knew!?!?!
And Lise – that’s not nice! But come on, shouldn’t there at least be peanut butter or cream cheese if you’re going to offer bagels?
Testing testing
Or at least, as used to say at the Alpine Inn, p.e.n.i.s. butter. That still slips out of my mouth at inappropriate times….
(See what I had to do to bypass the p.e.n.i.s. police!)
snarl!
Dude, it is so true about all these “swanky” looking guest houses with badd attitude
innkeepers. they are like the guestroom nazis. ammenities in ptown should be listed
as “if the innkeeper feels like it”.
so inspite of it all you still managed to have fun. good for you and thanks for putting it out there about the black pearl.
The Black Pearl has been officially blacklisted.
Jeff and I were treated far better in the house across the street a few years ago. The proprietor, our friend Tony, made made us sleep on the kitchen floor, but at least he tiptoed with his tricks into the bedroom. He never would have complained about extra guests.