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(Homo)Sex and the City

No, I’m not going to write about my debauched sexual escapades (if only I had some to write about)….I’m writing about my recent experiences with courting in Boston.

After our break up, Matt and I started using the internet to meet people. I was using it more as a means to make friends (props to Chris, Vito, David, David, Jason, Jason, Jason [lots of Jason’s and David’s], Peter, Duncan and Scott), whereas I think Matt was using it for dating. Of course, I’m open to dating, too…but I figure at this point it would be healthier for me, personally, not to dive into another long-term relationship. Plus, I’d used the internet as a way to meet friends for years (as you could probably tell by that list of names).

Anyway, back in late November, Matt told me about this guy he met on-line that seemed really interesting. After describing him to me, we realized that it was somebody I had been chatting with on-line (but never met) for the previous 5 months. Coincidence?…so we thought.

There was also this other guy who neither of us was necessarily chatting with, but who had emailed both of us around the same time and who we both found interesting. He seemed nice enough and seemed eager to meet up with me for possibly country-line dancing* and Matt for other activities. But that fizzled.

On Monday, Matt and I got together for lunch and were chatting about the people we were meeting. He started describing this guy that, once again, sounded familiar to me. We compared notes and realized that this is the same guy that one of my David friend’s had been trying to introduce me to!

After we discovered this, Matt and I went to the computer and he showed me all of the people he’s currently been chatting with. Fortunately, there were no other duplicates. But I suspect this is going to happen again. The funny thing is, there’s no jealousy. In fact, we both want the other person to be happy. I guess an advantage to this whole situation is that we both have fairly strong ideas of what “type” the other person is attracted to and, more importantly, compatible with. Perhaps I can contribute to him finding the man of his dreams? How twisted and wrong is that?


*Can you imagine me country line dancing? I think the look is hot (tight jeans, boots, cowboy hat), but just can’t see myself cutting a rug.


  1. Comment by Erica on January 26, 2005 4:29 pm

    Eh, it’d be charming and sweet if you two helped each other find new people. Or even new friends. Everyone should be so lucky to have a friend left in their ex after their breakup.

    I can totally see you doing the line dancing thing. Hat and everything. Sex-eh! 😀

  2. Comment by matt on January 26, 2005 6:45 pm

    I didn’t think I was going to be able to be friends with you, as you know. But, now, it just feels normal to me. Also, I don’t you can spend 10 years of your life (8 of which were romantic) with someone and just stop caring about them.

    Now, make Vitto call me! LOL!

  3. Comment by John on January 27, 2005 10:36 am

    Is there anywhere to do the CW dancing thing in Boston these days?

    The online thing is scary because one day you will be somewhere like a gay bar and look around and realized you’ve seen half the people there online.

    Funny true story: I was telling a friend about someone who I’d chatted with online & now had a coffee date with. After I provided the basic details (name, job, neighborhood) my friend got a funny look on his face. “What?” I asked.

    “Well,” he said, “If you get a chance, maybe you could my green gym bag from his house? It’s been there a few months.”

    Oops. (I never got the chance.)

  4. Comment by Karl on January 27, 2005 10:49 am

    Hey, John!

    Yeah – believe it or not there are a few CW dancing groups! The biggest one is “Gays for Patsy”. I always love their contingent in the gay pride parade.

  5. Comment by Karl on January 27, 2005 10:49 am

    Hey, John!

    Yeah – believe it or not there are a few CW dancing groups! The biggest one is “Gays for Patsy”. I always love their contingent in the gay pride parade.

  6. Comment by karyn on January 28, 2005 4:31 pm

    Wait…wait…I’m letting my mind’s eye adjust to the image of Karl…in…a…cowboy hat….and…boots…..Yeah actually it works. Go for it Snarl, dance your little heart out. But careful with your post titles! There’s such a thing as plagarism you know. *Snort!*

    I think it’s marvy you & Matt are still friends, loving you both as I do; I find it creepy to the point it defies words that you are online chatting up the same people. Yeesh.

  7. Comment by Ivailo on August 25, 2005 9:07 am

    Your blog is realy very interesting.

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