Pissy Metrosexual
On the (crowded) subway this morning I stood next to a set of doors that are on the opposite side of the subway platforms (meaning they won’t open so I wouldn’t be in people’s way as they got on or off the train) Anyway, there was a man seated next to me that I thought was gay. He was VERY effeminite, thin, dressed in a tailored suit, well manicured…I thought he had to be gay. HAD TO! In his sense of pseudo-self importance, he found it necessary to not only take up the space of his seat, but he was keeping his left arm out to the side (elbow pointing my way) as he held up the Metro newspaper.
Then I noticed he was reading the sports page of the paper. OK – I know there are gay sports fans out there* but I since there were no pictures of men on the sports page, I determined that this man was ultimately straight.
Suddenly the train lurched a bit and the man standing next to me (who was unable to grab hold of any bars because of the crowds) stumbled towards the seated metrosexual and bumped into his unnecessarily protruding elbow.
You wouldn’t believe the daggers shooting out of the eyes of Miss Prissy Thang! The man that bumped him said sorry, then squeezed his way to a spot where he could hold on for the rest of the ride. But Miss Thang kept rolling her eyes and looking away from the paper. You’d have thought the stumbler had actually murdered Miss Thang’s wife, but all he did was bump into her elbow (which shouldn’t have been where it was in the first place). Some people. First that vomiting straight woman in Ptown, now the bitchy straight man on the subway. I’m losing faith in the world.
*OK – speaking of sports fans…what the f*ck is the big deal about Nomar Garciaparra leaving the Red Sox? I mean, it’s a damn game people. The freakin’ newspapers are reporting about children crying because of this. The guy isn’t dead…he’s relocating. Get a grip. Besides, with spring training in Florida and half of their games being “away games”, it’s not like he was a regular fixture in the Boston area except at Fenway Park or charity events. You’ll still be able to see him on TV. Anyway, this will be the third time I’ve posted this image but, once again, it seems fitting since I’m talking about straight people and sports.
8 Comments
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maybe she was reading the end of another article, one that happened to conclude on the sports page. was it the article that compares and contrasts the fashion styles of laura bush and teresa kerry?
Karl, you’ve only been back for a few days.
Focus, you are losing faith too quickly.
Hey, I didn’t see you on my train! I wasn’t really reading the sports section. I was just admiring the newly-created font. And, I might add — that horrid little man wrinkled my suit!
Karl, that picture is too gross to live!
Karl….my faith in you is starting to wane….Enough of the Red Sox bashing…losing Nomar is a HUGE issue to Boston fans, he was the backbone of the team, watch carefully as the team implodes now….
The text was good, but i stil cant find the play ipdates. looking for it dude.
A heap of wheat, says the Song of Songs
but I’ve never seen wheat in a pile 🙂
did you like it?
Nice one, but what about der weg ? anywya, congrats from me.