Monthly Archives: January 2004

Suspicion is increasing that the serial failures of the European Beagle and the American Rover interplanetary exploration vehicles recently placed on the surface of Mars are not coincidental. These multi-million dollar vehicles, seemingly in perfect working order, have both suddenly … Continue reading →

The following story concerns Cofer Black (now there’s a name to conger with), US Ambassador for Terrorism. Our question is, since when does the United States have ambassadors to things as amorphous as "Terrorism" or even "anti-terrorism"? The Dowbrigade’s dictionary says … Continue reading →

BUCHAREST, Romania (Reuters) — A team of Romanian and U.S. doctors say they have successfully removed a tumor weighing 175 pounds (80 kilograms) from a woman patient in an operation lasting 10 hours. Lucica Bunghez, 47, had been largely confined … Continue reading →

Ok, well, it had to be done. Here’s a song Philip Barlow made using Apple’s GarageBand and Howard Dean’s defining moment / primal scream of last night: howarddean.mp3 (about 350k). from Barlow Farms via Andrew G.

BOSTON –The Department of Homeland Security’s plan to hold detainees in cells in a new office building along the historic Freedom Trail, in the neighborhood that saw the first major fighting of the American Revolution, has residents here preparing to … Continue reading →

No, it doesn’t read your mind, just bypasses the eardrums by transfering the call through bone vibrations! Japanese telecom carriers, pioneers of internet-capable and picture-snapping handsets, have now come up with the world’s first mobile phone that enables users to … Continue reading →

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note…these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big … Continue reading →

Norma Yvonne Declares Self "Double Boss" of Dowbrigade and Dowbrigade News Regular readers may notice a significant upgrade in the content and aestetics of the Dowbrigade News, due to the fact that the wife of the managing editor, rejecting a … Continue reading →

Not that the Dowbrigade would ever need such a thing, but one can’t be too careful… An Israeli rabbi has invented a prayer to help Jews overcome the guilt of visiting pornographic websites. The benediction by Shlomo Eliahu says: "Please … Continue reading →

It’s hard to even imagine a solution to the Latin tradegy that is Colombia. An article in tomorrow’s New York Times captures the difficulty and dangers inherent in retuning that beautiful county to its rightful owners. "…an older, festering crime … Continue reading →

Portland, Ore. – It may not be long before you hear airport security screeners ask, "Do you plan on hijacking this plane?" A U.S. company using technology developed in Israel is pitching a lie detector small enough to fit in … Continue reading →