I have a pathological fear of the government, in all of its forms and manifestations. In this I feel profoundly American, as my cursory study of US History leads me to believe that our great country was founded by a bunch of paranoid reprobates whose main motivation was fear and loathing for the British crown, and who went to great lengths to circumscribe and inhibit the inevitable power-mad blood lust which comes over career politicians in major capitals.
This ingrained American aversion to government, reinforced by coming of age on the fringes of the counter-culture in the 60’s and an innate anti-authoritarian bent, has developed into a full-fledged phobia for all things governmental. In all forms and manifestations. I am afraid of the IRS, the state police, the local police, customs agents, the local town hall, the Migra (they are absolutely the worst but I will save them for a separate screed), the courts, the social security agency, the state department of social services, the FBI, the fire department, the turnpike commission and investigative branch of the US Postal Service. Lately this phobia has been extending even to individuals only tenuously and peripherally related to the government – like yesterday when I had to take my car in to be inspected.
OK, so Tony (of Tony’s Salem Service Station) doesn’t work directly for the State. But he gives out those little official State inspection stickers without which you are risking serious financial, legal and even liberty problems, with the seal of the state indelibly inscribed, and that alone is enough to give me the willies.
However, I gritted my teeth and took my ancient VW in to face the music. It wasn’t as bad as I had feared (these things rarely are, of course). The front end is shot, requiring new tie rods and maybe ball joints on both sides. I can get away with one new tire. And the horn doesn’t work, but if I am lucky it is simply a matter of a fuse. Tomorrow I’ll get the estimate of how much it will cost to fix all that stuff. Meanwhile, I proudly display my official “Rejected” sticker, which gives me 30 days to shape up or ship out. Stay tuned…..