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Kinky’s Mysteries

As Kinky Friedman is running for governor in my future home state, I decided to check out some of his mystery novels. They are hilarious. And full of twisted two-bit cowboy philosophy. I have been laughing like an idiot on the subway every morning while reading Spanking Watson. So far it is a tale of a man, his cat, and a troupe of dancing lesbians. I have yet to hit on the mystery. But here is an excerpt about the relationship between man and cat:

The cat looked back at me with a brief glance of disdain. Like all cats, she was essentially a humorless, constipated prig at heart, if indeed cats had hearts. Like all people, I was essentially perverse, pugnacious, paranoid, covered in the grime of humanity, and always and forever standing in the way of myself and my heart, if indeed people had hearts.

I would change “people” to “men”, of course.

7 Responses to “Kinky’s Mysteries”

  1. snjoseph
    April 12th, 2005 | 5:55 pm

    Ugh, don’t move to Texas. Austin’s not bad, but Boston is better.

  2. cynthia rockwell
    April 12th, 2005 | 6:01 pm

    i’m done with boston.

  3. guy
    April 12th, 2005 | 6:09 pm

    so [a] you’re officially moving? and [b] you officially hate men now? wtf?

  4. snjoseph
    April 13th, 2005 | 12:33 am

    Whatever, I was done with Dallas, but I didn’t move to Salt Lake City. That’s like saying, “Fuck this frying pan, fire’s for me!” It really doesn’t get much better than Boston in America: you’ve got a subway system, mushy-liberal politicians, art ‘n’ culcha, married gays–pretty fucking good! It’s too bad you got stuck with Harvard and the concomitant twerps, but every city has its dark side.

    Also, the men aren’t any better in Texas than anywhere else. Ask Erin; she’ll probably tell you they’re worse, actually.

  5. cynthia rockwell
    April 13th, 2005 | 7:20 am

    austin is hardly salt lake city. and i don’t expect men to be any better anywhere. but my roots are southern and one thing that has always bothered me about the northeast is its anti-southern bias. plus, austin has a huge film community, much bigger and better than boston. can a town the produced richard linklater be so bad?

  6. troll
    April 16th, 2005 | 7:13 pm

    southern white trash roots? the northeast despises southerners thanks to buffoons like dubya. he’s a snapshot of all that is texas. the only thing the south has on us is the weather.

  7. cynthia rockwell
    April 16th, 2005 | 7:20 pm

    you call yourself a troll? my bucktoothed white trash west virginia relatives could do better than that. go back to trolling that jackass philg.