the guy by the door …

She’s twenty something and I’m sixty something, but I follow her. She knows I’m there. It doesn’t spook her. We’re on twitter. Sindi was bored, bored, bored. This video made her a little homesick for Vancouver.  Then:

You always think you have all the time in the world..then someone is ripped from your life. Rip doll 🙁9:20 PM Jan 30th from TweetDeck

Jenny was twenty something too. She didn’t want to wear a seat belt. Sindi tweets disbelief. Three hours later Sindi went from ‘super sad’  to  ‘super pissed off’ – a little Kübler-Ross thing going on. I didn’t mention it to Sindi at the time. Now I have – twofold. I like to tell people in grief about Kübler-Ross. It feels like helping. I don’t know if it is.

Sindi asked us all to please wear a seat belt. It won’t bring Jenny back, but it’ll make Sindi feel better. Be safe, if not for yourself, for Sindi and the Jenny that lingers within her.

my girl is still signed onto yahoo messenger… sent her a message, knowing I wont get a reply. Hoping it’s all just a bad dream..it’s not.7:51 AM Jan 31st from web

Sindi had a great deal of trouble sleeping.  She was awake well into the morning.

Laying in bed..crying…wishing I was holding into her. This is something I cannot shake.9:17 AM Jan 31st from TweetDeck

“…holding into her.”  Typo or intriguing variation. Freudian in a good way.

So..Um… I’m just supposed to go to bed? Put my ipod down and get on with my life? 🙁9:36 AM Jan 31st from TweetDeck

Eventually weariness prevailed to some extent. After fitful on-and-off sleep:

Shock is starting to fade. Reality is set in…my girl is gone 🙁 Keep going to my phone to look for texts from her…there is none.about 13 hours ago from web

Sindi is a digital native – a loved one dies and she suffers on the net. Netizens  do their best to console her. I’m a netizen, but an immigrant – a very experienced immigrant.  Part of my accent is to worry about her privacy. I’m so touched by her that I had to share it more widely. But I’ve been cryptic about some details and if she feels I’ve made her grief too public, i’ll remove or alter it. I do hope she feels good about it though, because this post will complement nicely my somewhat overdue post about recent BGLT activism in Massachusetts.

Jenny, I’m not a smart man, but I know what love is.     –Forrest Gump

I’m a very smart man, but I’m not sure I know what love is.     –the guy who makes windows

I believe Forrest and as much as he suffered for it, I believe his love for Jenny was worth it. I believe Sindi and as much as she suffers for it, I believe her love for Jenny was worth it.