{"id":201,"date":"2005-11-14T10:16:33","date_gmt":"2005-11-14T14:16:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.law.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/11\/14\/a-lesbian-tried-to-kill-me-today\/"},"modified":"2005-11-14T10:16:33","modified_gmt":"2005-11-14T14:16:33","slug":"a-lesbian-tried-to-kill-me-today","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/11\/14\/a-lesbian-tried-to-kill-me-today\/","title":{"rendered":"A Lesbian Tried to Kill Me Today"},"content":{"rendered":"

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I always knew you couldn’t trust a lesbian (except to fix your car)* I was crossing Mass Ave in Cambridge this morning (between Harvard and Porter Squares…near Chang Sho) when I nearly lost my life. For once, though, I had the right of way…I was actually using a cross walk – something completely unheard of in Massachusetts.<\/P>
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Here’s the scenario: I’m bee-bopping along the sidewalk on one side of the street listening to my iPod (shuffle mode…the song was “Let the Music Play, by Shannon). I recalled that I needed money so I decided to go to my bank on the other side of the street. I crossed the two lanes of traffic going in one direction and safely reached the traffic island\/median strip. I then continued walking IN THE CROSSWALK toward my destination sidewalk after letting a speeding car go by.<\/P>
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All of a sudden this frosted blonde\/manly beast in a black SUV (talking on a cell phone, I might add) was apparently stunned to see an actual pedestrian in the crosswalk for her solution to seeing me in front of her was to honk her horn vigorously and swerve into the (fortunately) empty parking spaces to her right (it also seemed as though she was accelerating as if I was a target – but that’s just speculation). Anyway, after making her big lesbionic scene, she continued honking her horn and waving her left hand at me with some not-so-lady-like gestures.<\/P>
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As she sped away, I could see the blue and yellow equal sign of the Human Rights Campaign in her back window. Despite feeling she and I should have some sort of solidarity, I still wished she’d drive into a telephone pole and suffer a violent and painful death.<\/P>
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But aside from my near death experience this morning, I had a great Sunday to go along with my great Thursday, Friday and Saturday. After some blah day time activities (laundry, groceries), I met up with Mike again at Trinity Church and we headed off to Jae’s (restaurant) for dinner. Then we walked back to the North End – enjoying the early Christmas displays in the tres-gay stores along the way…like Crate and Barrel and Restoration Hardware. At my place, we ate Ben and Jerry’s and watched the Saturday Night Live Special.<\/P>
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I miss Jan Hooks.<\/P>
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 <\/P>
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*This is complete sarcasm….no offense intended. Some of my best friends are lesbians. Well, that’s not really true. But I did date two lesbians.<\/P><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I always knew you couldn’t trust a lesbian (except to fix your car)* I was crossing Mass Ave in Cambridge this morning (between Harvard and Porter Squares…near Chang Sho) when I nearly lost my life. For once, though, I had the right of way…I was actually using a cross walk – something completely unheard of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-201","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/201","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/74"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=201"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/201\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=201"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=201"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=201"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}