{"id":190,"date":"2005-10-30T09:53:16","date_gmt":"2005-10-30T13:53:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.law.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/10\/30\/nobody-warned-me\/"},"modified":"2005-10-30T09:53:16","modified_gmt":"2005-10-30T13:53:16","slug":"nobody-warned-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/10\/30\/nobody-warned-me\/","title":{"rendered":"Nobody Warned Me"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Things started taking a turn for the better this weekend. On Friday night, I went to the Halloween pumpkin carving party. I had a really good time and got to meet my friend, Jason’s, other friends. They were quite nice and, fortunately, there was no carnage involved even with 12-15 somewhat inebriated men and woman playing with sharp knives. The biggest pain issues were associated with one person’s wound from touching the heating element of a toaster oven and another person’s hangnail stinging from the pumpkin innerds (is that a word? It doesn’t look right…innards?)<\/P>
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Actually, maybe there was some carnage. I was a pumpkin carving virgin (likely the last thing you could claim me to be a virgin of…but that’s a whole other blog posting) and I’ve never seen something as digusting as a pumpkin’s insides. Nobody warned me what the inside would look (or smell) like.<\/P>
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I’m not sure what I was expecting. Perhaps either the consistency of a squash (gooy, but solid). I suppose it could have been like a bell pepper (seeds, but firm). No, you slice off the top of a pumpkin and you’re greeted by essentially by a big orange bowl of alien snot.<\/P>
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It’s the most disgusting thing! Just goo dangling by stringy pieces of goo with random clumps of gooey seeds.  There is no organized seed growth (like in a pepper). It’s just a gooey madness that just shouldn’t exist in nature.<\/P>
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After having to use my bare hands to scoop out the sludge (i wish I had hand condoms…I guess those would be called rubber gloves, huh?) I managed to carve the following.<\/P>
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I call him Wilbur. I brought him home from the party with me (SCORE!) and he’s been hanging out in my kitchen ever since. I’m not sure what to do with him for Halloween night. I fear if he hangs out by the window, it may attract trick-or-treaters. That’s not good. But I’m definitely kicking him out soon because he’s not the best house guest (he kinda smells and I hate when somebody smiles all the time).<\/P><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Things started taking a turn for the better this weekend. On Friday night, I went to the Halloween pumpkin carving party. I had a really good time and got to meet my friend, Jason’s, other friends. They were quite nice and, fortunately, there was no carnage involved even with 12-15 somewhat inebriated men and woman […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/190","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/74"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=190"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/190\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=190"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=190"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=190"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}