{"id":19,"date":"2005-01-27T10:40:50","date_gmt":"2005-01-27T14:40:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.law.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/01\/27\/riding-on-the-metro-a-screenplay-of-my-"},"modified":"2005-01-27T10:40:50","modified_gmt":"2005-01-27T14:40:50","slug":"riding-on-the-metro-a-screenplay-of-my-morning-commute-theme-song-b","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/2005\/01\/27\/riding-on-the-metro-a-screenplay-of-my-morning-commute-theme-song-b\/","title":{"rendered":"“Riding on the Metro”: A Screenplay of My Morning Commute (theme song by Berlin, of course)"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Normally I’ve got my Discman playing when I ride the train in the morning. This morning, however, I did not – so I was able to observe two separate conversations that will make up the two acts to my screenplay: One called “Cuteness”, the other called “Annoyance.”<\/P>
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Act One: Cuteness<\/P>
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Scene: I’m standing on the inbound platform at the Porter Sqaure red-line station. An earthy\/crunchy, stereotypical Cambridge couple (40-ish) stands next to me with their bundled-up little boy (perhaps 5 or 6 years old). <\/P>
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Earth Dad: Don’t stand too close the yellow line, Billy.<\/P>
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Boy: Why?<\/P>
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Earth Dad: Because the train will be coming soon and you can’t stand too close<\/P>
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Boy: Oh…why?<\/P>
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Earth Dad: Well, the trains can come pretty fast<\/P>
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(note: at this point – they’d been standing there perhaps 30 seconds)<\/P>
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Boy: Wow, this is the longest I’ve ever waited for anything…EVER!<\/P>
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Earth Mom: The train will be here soon.<\/P>
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Boy: Why are there 3 rails for the train?<\/P>
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Earth Dad: Well, that’s because….<\/P>
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Boy: (interrupts Earth Dad) Are the wheels at different heights? The rail is higher than the others.<\/P>
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Earth Dad: That’s why you stay behind the yellow line. The higher rail makes the train move.<\/P>
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Boy: Why?<\/P>
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Earth Dad: Electricity.<\/P>
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Boy: Oh. Can we go to the snack bar when we get on the train?<\/P>
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Scene Over.<\/P>
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Anyway, I thought that was so cute (and I usually can’t stand children). I love the idea of a snack bar on the subway, too. Sometimes, you need to think outside the box.<\/P>
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 <\/P>
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Act 2: Annoyance<\/P>
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Scene: Crowded subway car heading inbound from Porter Sqaure to Harvard Square. I’m standing with a 50-ish woman in front of me. We’ll call her Denise. Among the crowd to my left stands a 20-something female who boarded the train after me. We’ll call her Kathy.<\/P>
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Denise: Hey, Kathy<\/P>
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Kathy: Hi, Denise. How are you doing?<\/P>
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Denise: Ugh. I decided not to drive today because of the snow. (big sigh)<\/P>
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Kathy: Oh? How was it?<\/P>
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Denise: (HUGE, over-the-top sigh). Ugh. I took the commuter rail to Porter Square, then grabbed the subway from there.<\/P>
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Kathy: Was it bad.<\/P>
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Denise: I can’t wait until I can drive again. I nearly didn’t get off at Porter because the ride was so quick, I didn’t realize I was already there. In fact, I started falling asleep!<\/P>
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Kathy: Oh, really?<\/P>
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Denise: Yeah, Even with the snow it took much less time than when I normally drive in with good weather.<\/P>
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Kathy: Wow.<\/P>
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Denise: I know.<\/P>
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(Note: the train slows down to enter Harvard Square – which is the final destination for Denise, Kathy and me. Apparently, we all work for Harvard).<\/P>
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Denise: Oh my God. We’re here already? Wow, that was fast.<\/P>
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Kathy: Yeah, it’s only one stop from Porter. I take the subway everyday.<\/P>
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Denise: Oh, well this is enough for me. I’ll be happy when the weather clears up and I can drive again.<\/P>
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Scene Over.<\/P>
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I hate Denise. Her ride was restful enough for her to nearly fall asleep, it took less time than her normal driving commute (despite the aftermath of a blizzard), and public transit is better for the environment. Yet she still bitched and moaned about the commute even though she had nothing negative to say? I’m serious – you should have heard her overly-dramatic sighing. It’s as if she had exhausted herself (or stooped down to a lower social level) by taking public transit. Meanwhile, it took her less time than ever and she got to rest. Screw her. I hope she goes into poverty because her SUV guzzles more gas than her paultry Harvard salary can afford.<\/P>
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 <\/P><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Normally I’ve got my Discman playing when I ride the train in the morning. This morning, however, I did not – so I was able to observe two separate conversations that will make up the two acts to my screenplay: One called “Cuteness”, the other called “Annoyance.” Act One: Cuteness Scene: I’m standing on the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":74,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/74"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/snarl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}