{"id":4334,"date":"2006-01-22T23:17:46","date_gmt":"2006-01-23T03:17:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.law.harvard.edu\/formerlyknownas\/2006\/01\/22\/hey-doj-blame-google-and-yaho"},"modified":"2011-08-05T14:54:14","modified_gmt":"2011-08-05T18:54:14","slug":"hey-doj-blame-google-and-yahoo-too","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/2006\/01\/22\/hey-doj-blame-google-and-yahoo-too\/","title":{"rendered":"hey, DOJ, blame Google (and Yahoo!, too)"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Below is the letter we plan to send ASAP to the Department of Justice,  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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so they will understand that all the strange querists,<\/EM> who come to this <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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weblog based on kinky search engine queries, got here inadvertently<\/FONT><\/EM>.  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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We’re into legal commentary and genuine haiku, not pornography (and,  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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our constructive criticism of the present Administration is really quite <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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de minimis <\/EM>and proffer<\/FONT>ed with all due respect)  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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\"HornHulkJustice\"  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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  <\/FONT>Horn<\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A>‘s Lady Justice<\/EM>    <\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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to:<\/EM>  Department of Justice<\/STRONG>, Pornography Desk<\/EM><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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        cc: Political Enemies Department<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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             Organized Crime Unit<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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re:<\/EM> Inadvertent Visitors to f\/k\/a<\/EM><\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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It has come to our attention that your Department came into <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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possession last year of certain search engine query records, and <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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similar information, and are seeking even more from <\/FONT>Google<\/FONT><\/A>.com., <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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as part of your efforts to demonstrate the need for the Children’s <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Online Protection Act (COPA). [Boston <\/EM>Globe<\/EM>, “<\/FONT>Google Subpoena<\/FONT><\/A> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Roils the web,” Jan. 21, 2006; Search EngineWatch<\/EM>, “The Day After: <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Points in the <\/FONT>Search Trust Sweepstakes<\/FONT><\/A>,” Jan.20, 2006; MSN <\/EM><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Search’s Weblog<\/EM>, <\/FONT><\/FONT>Privacy and MSN<\/FONT><\/A> Search, January. 20, 2006; <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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NYT<\/EM>, “<\/FONT><\/FONT>Google Resists<\/FONT><\/A>,”  Jan. 20, 2006; Schneier on Security<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A><\/FONT>; <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Daniel <\/FONT>Solove, “<\/FONT>Government vs. Google<\/FONT><\/A>,” “<\/FONT>Perhaps Do Some Good<\/FONT><\/A>“, <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Jan. 20, 2006; and Deep Links<\/EM>, “DOJ Gone Google-Fishin’<\/FONT><\/A>)<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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                                                                                  \"GoogleSign\"<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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Your strategy<\/FONT><\/A>, as we understand it, is to show that (even with por-<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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nography websites using special filters to keep out minors) children<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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can now enter innocuous queries into search engine and be taken to X-<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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rated websites.  Contrary to advice from our <\/FONT>counsel<\/FONT><\/A>, we, the editorial <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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staff and proprietor of f\/k\/a, <\/EM>are writing at this time, in case the Depart-<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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ment is also concerned about the inverse<\/EM> situation, where perverted or <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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kinky-sounding search questions lead to perfectly innocuous websites <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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and materials, such as ours.  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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We refer to such visitors as “<\/FONT>Inadvertent Searchees<\/FONT><\/A>” and — to our great <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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regret — a significant portion of our website hits fall into the IS<\/EM> category.  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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We are writing in a good-faith effort to deter any future investigation of us <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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by your staff, due to our receiving those wayard hits.    In fact, we believe <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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that improved search algorithms and strategies by the major search engines, <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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and better self-imposed filters by each of them, would save blameless sites <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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like ours from the inadvertent (and unsolicited) visitors.<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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       “tinyredcheck”  To summarize our position: It’s Google’s fault!<\/EM> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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— and Yahoo!, MSN, and Ask Jeeves, too.   We can’t help it <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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if our poetry and commentary cover many aspects of life, which <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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get twisted <\/FONT>and connected out of context by poorly-designed <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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software. <\/FONT>Cf.<\/EM> <\/FONT><\/FONT>a Google blind date<\/FONT><\/A> (May 13, 2005)<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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using his nose
the dog searches
the violets<\/EM><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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    <\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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   <\/FONT><\/FONT>Kobayashi Issa<\/FONT><\/A> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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     translated by <\/FONT>David G. Lanoue<\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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     \"holy We have no idea how many of f\/k\/a<\/EM>‘s Inadvertent <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Searchees are under-aged.  You can rest assured, however, that <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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we would never have received the <\/FONT>Blawg Review<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A> 2005 Creative <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Lawyer Blog Award, if we were not a family-friendly website. <\/FONT><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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[By the way, as we hope you know, f\/k\/a <\/EM>means “formerly known as,” and <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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is not an alternative or deceptive spelling of a term that is often preceded <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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by the word “mother-” and found in unsavory places and mouths.]<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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night in the hut
searching on the shelf
. . . katydid<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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   <\/FONT>Kobayashi Issa<\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV>
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       translated by <\/FONT>David G. Lanoue<\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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With that explanation, we want to list for you a representative sample <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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of questionable search terms that have resulted in Negligently Inadvertent <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Search Results, leading to our site.   You can find a perfectly innocent <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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explanation for each of them by going to our Inadvertent Searchee <\/FONT><\/FONT><\/FONT>pages<\/FONT><\/A> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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and doing a little scrolling.<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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“googleSignN”<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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For example, although each of the following queries yielded <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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a link to an f\/k\/a<\/EM> post at or near the top of Google or Yahoo! <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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search results, we were clearly unjustly selected, as our <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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materials were neither published with lascivious intent, nor <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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aimed at either children or so-called Mature Audiences, and <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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had no connection whatever with bestiality, illegal drugs, or<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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either satanic or bondage rituals.<\/FONT><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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  ex with animals<\/FONT><\/A><\/EM>> man wink<\/FONT><\/A>> judge urinate nyc<\/FONT><\/A><\/EM>>  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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  adolescent wiccans”<\/FONT><\/A>> “ghosts who kill”<\/FONT><\/A>>  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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sexual relations with clients<\/FONT><\/A>> new ethical porno<\/FONT><\/A>>  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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 teenyboppers undressed<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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waiting undressed <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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for the new doctor – <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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cold feet<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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    dagosan<\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV><\/DIV>
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what does it mean if you get your period a week early<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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 misuse of ellipses<\/FONT><\/A>>  tripping over dogs with dementia<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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wanita young cookies<\/FONT><\/A>>   sexy threesome postures<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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pout group discussion<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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a good pout<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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rudely interrupted<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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by impatiens<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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   dagosan<\/FONT><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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the farting contest<\/FONT><\/SPAN><\/DIV>
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begins again —<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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winter seclusion<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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   <\/FONT>Issa<\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A>,<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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     translated by <\/FONT>David G. Lanoue<\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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woman farting on blind date<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>> soup slurping complaints<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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how to make a two year old behave<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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<\/EM>poems about the devil (ABA)><\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>  <\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV>
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fires on the mountain –<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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look like Buddha<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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look like devil<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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    <\/FONT><\/EM><\/FONT>Issa<\/FONT><\/U><\/STRONG>, <\/FONT><\/FONT>
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     translated by <\/EM><\/FONT>David G. Lanoue<\/EM><\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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naked cheerleaders morrow county<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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“illegal to show sexually explicit movies in vehicles”<\/FONT><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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baring summer tan lines<\/EM><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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late summer–
baring the tan line
on my wrist <\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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     Alice Frampton<\/FONT><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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decapitated tulips<\/FONT><\/A>> wife+rump<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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hots moms<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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family picnic<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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the new wife’s rump <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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bigger than mine<\/FONT><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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                                           <\/FONT><\/FONT>Roberta Beary<\/EM><\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A> <\/FONT><\/EM><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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                                              <\/FONT><\/EM>modern haiku<\/EM><\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A> 34-3<\/EM><\/FONT><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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     “red hots” <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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for an instant i’m ten<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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           and<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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  father’s still alive<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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       <\/FONT>Ed Markowski<\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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“spotlightS”<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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While we have your attention, we would also like to <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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clarify that the proprietor of this weblog has no ties of <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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any sort with organized crime, and does not espouse <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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the use of violence (even against members of the bar),<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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despite the results of the following search queries:<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/EM>gumba meaning Italian<\/EM><\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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                                          <\/EM>alito finito Italian<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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                                                              \"AlitoSA\"<\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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<\/EM>giacalone cement<\/FONT><\/EM><\/A>>           <\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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money mob<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers loyalty<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT><\/EM> <\/DIV>
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                                           omerta in New Jersey<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/EM><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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\"honest Finally, we want to assure all DOJ staffers and <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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manage<\/FONT>ment that the results of the following search queries <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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have <\/FONT>nothing to do with disrespect for the Office of the <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Presidency or the current occupant thereof on the part of <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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the <\/FONT>editors of this website.  Honest.<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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   teach humility<\/FONT><\/A><\/EM>>  misuse of ellipses<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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   distinguishing participle from gerund<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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passive liar<\/FONT><\/A>> Something Bad Has Begun<\/FONT><\/A>><\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Lawyers’ Day<\/FONT><\/A>> reversing bad karma<\/A><\/EM>><\/FONT><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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  the scarecrow is president<\/FONT><\/A>> <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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in a fine spot <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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for moongazing …<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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scarecrow<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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   <\/FONT>Issa<\/STRONG><\/FONT><\/A>,<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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     translated by <\/FONT>David G. Lanoue<\/FONT><\/A><\/DIV><\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV><\/DIV>
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If you have any questions about any issue or fact <\/FONT><\/DIV>
\n
raised above, feel free to contact <\/FONT>Prof. Yabut<\/FONT><\/A>, our <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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counsel.  <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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respectfully submitted,<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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The f\/k\/a<\/EM> Gang<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE>
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p.s.<\/STRONG><\/EM>  Because your Department favors the small entrepeneur, we <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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hope you will leave the folks at Scroogle<\/EM><\/A> alone. They are providing <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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an important service for people who would like to use search engines <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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anonymously.  (via <\/EM>Robert Ambrogi’s Lawsites<\/EM><\/FONT><\/A>, Jan. 21, 2006)  Give <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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Clusty<\/EM><\/A>, which offers clustered search engine results and no tracking, <\/FONT><\/DIV>
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a break, too.  Finally, please forgive Jon Swift<\/EM> his trespasses<\/A> — all <\/FONT><\/DIV>
\n
those excuses sound pretty good to us. Thanks.<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV>
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                                                                                   \"HornHulkJusticeNS\"<\/FONT><\/DIV>
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<\/FONT> <\/DIV><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/BLOCKQUOTE><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Below is the letter we plan to send ASAP to the Department of Justice,   so they will understand that all the strange querists, who come to this weblog based on kinky search engine queries, got here inadvertently.  We’re into legal commentary and genuine haiku, not pornography (and,   our constructive criticism of the present Administration is really […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":94,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2926],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4334","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pre-06-2006"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6kP1R-17U","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4334","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/94"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4334"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4334\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12818,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4334\/revisions\/12818"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4334"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4334"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/ethicalesq\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4334"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}