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f/k/a archives . . . real opinions & real haiku

December 23, 2005

warm holiday fuzzies

Filed under: pre-06-2006 — David Giacalone @ 11:00 pm

We’ve been posting Christmas-related haiku throughout the

past week, for your Holiday enjoyment.  Tonight (instead of

gift wrapping), your procrastinating Editor collected haiku

and senryu by our Honored Guest Poets, plus dagosan, to  

create the f/k/a christmas season haiku page.   With more

than 40 one-breath poems, there is something to please every

Grinch and Scrooge (and perhaps Christmas Warriors, too).


However, don’t fret that we’ve become too soft and    NoSantaGS

sentimental here at the home of Prof. Yabut and

skepticalEsq.  For example:

tiny check  Your editor has never gotten all warm or

fuzzy over Christmas and birthday cards from life

and auto insurers, or law firms, and the like.  So,

there wasn’t much chance of me smiling joyously at

the e-card greetings that arrived today from Andrew Cuomo,

son of New York’s illustrious former governor, Mario,

and current candidate for State Attorney General. 

Nonetheless, just in case his cute daughters and 

sappy sentiments are just what you need to get

into the Holiday Spirit, I will repeat them here:



                        “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!



Thank you for a year of friendship, love

and support.  We wish you a very happy

holiday season and all good things in the

New Year!


                   with love,


 Cara, Mariah, Michaela and Andrew

My giving “friendship, love and support” without even knowing

about it is quite a feat — just think what might happen if I

were trying.   Since Andrew is being so nice, here is a tip

for him:  I might very well vote for you next year, but it

won’t be because of your faux gratitude.  Phony e-motions

won’t compensate for a perceived lack of humility and

gravitas — but they could easily send potential supporters

looking elsewhere.


Your organizational skills are also a bit suspect: the Holidays

e-message points to the Andrew Cuomo for Attorney Website,

which currently has a blank white page, that declares in the

upper lefthand corner: “ is coming shortly.”  

“Coming shortly” is never a great strategy for getting elected. 

You’ve got big name-recognition advantages right now over Mark

Green and other opponents, Andrew, but you might squander

it, if you don’t get your act together.  Capice?


p.s.  Andrew, you have apparently co-opted or purchased

the mailing list of an internet public interest group. Please

tell them from me that I’m not thrilled that they have used

our connection in this way.


another Christmas . . .
my parents visit
the son in prison

    Lee Gurga

tiny check  It may be the Holiday Season, but I still get fr ventalone

annoyed every time I see some criminal defense lawyer

arguing that embarrassment is enough of a punishment

for a public figure who breaks the law.  This time, we are 

supposed to feel sorry for 78-year-old Anthony Doria, who

founded the Vermont Law School, and admitted guilt on tax

evasion — taking $115,000 from a woman in her 70’s and

spending it rather than investing for her.  It is equally wrong-

headed for a judge to be persuaded by such rubbish.  Here,

U.S. District Judge J. Garvan Murtha sentenced Doria (who

was originally facing up to 145 years) to only one month in

prison.  We agree with Assistant U.S. Attorney Elizabeth

Woodcock, who said “embarrassment is not in the senten-

cing guidelines.”   (see AP/Burlington Free Press


Prof. Yabut says:

If you value your reputation and you don’t

want to do time as an octagenarian, you

ought to avoid felonies in your 70’s. 




Christmas morning–
we wake up holding
each other’s hand

 Lee Gurga from Fresh Scent (1998) 


                  p.s.  Christmas Commercialism getting you down?

                     check out our st. nicholas v. santa claus post.



wrapping, packing, musing

Filed under: pre-06-2006 — David Giacalone @ 9:55 am

What stage of Christmas/Holiday preparations have you

reached?   Office party?  Last-minute shopping?  En route

to see loved ones?  Wrapping?  Still baking?   Packing your

car for a trip?   The f/k/a Gang is still a little behind.


If you don’t get back here before Christmas, Hanukkah,  starXmas

or the Holiday of your choice, please take our sincere

wishes with you for a joyous and peaceful holiday season.


Randy Brooks has captured a mix of moments and

emotions that touched me this morning. 


Christmas morning–

        misty breath of cows

        rising where they lie







home from the war

not your prayers

he says just luck



ship to label sm




through the open door . . .

her smile doesn’t forgive

all my sins







the daughter taps flour

into a mixing bowl . . .

mother’s apron tight









cedar walking cane

hangs from the coat rack

dust on the handles curves



“snowflakeS”  “SnowflakeS”



praising the hostess


in his moustache








big brother’s grin . . .

the last piece of the puzzle

out of his pocket





grandpa’s cedar cane

      my son poling holes

      in a snow drift








stockings on the mantel . . .

the child’s eyes follow sparks

up the chimney       






from School’s Out (Press Here, 1999)  

except: “home from the war” – Modern Haiku (Summer 2005)




tiny checkI’ve had a hard time getting into the punditry mode this week, but

Prof. Bainbridge has been opining at his usual prolific pace.  Check

out his coverage of Britain’s plan to keep watch on all vehicle

movements on the nation’s roads. [we’re still worrying about wintry

precipitation for our drive on Saturday]




Also check out Steve’s continuing reportage on New York Attorny

General and Governor-in-waiting Eliot Spitzer — Prof. B. asks whether

Spitzer = Thug? and whether he’s channeling Teddy Roosevelt.  The

closest we’ve come to such heady issues lately is Prof. Yabut’s recent

comment that a spitzer is a sharpener in the German language, with the

verb spitzen meaning to nib or sharpen.  The noun spitze is acuteness,

the pinnacle, a sting (or a prick).  After a few stops at the f/k/a Holiday

Punch Bowl last night, Yabut also pointed out that Spitzer would have

made a darn good Reindeer Name, noting that Eliot, too, may have to

battle a guy name Rudolf for the lead position.   






victorian christmas
a trail of horse shit
down the main street







stuck beneath
the nativity stamp
a strand of blond hair




         (Dec. 10 and Dec. 16)




that godless salesgirl said
“Happy Holidays!”


       dagosan [for Steve Bainbridge]





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