Earlier tonight, I went to the 50th anniversary celebration of the release of Saul Bellow’s The Adventures of Augie March. Bellow himself was on the bill, but unable to make it (another audience member speculated that he was probably feeling out of it after watching the Cubs fall in the playoffs).
At the reading, Martin Amis chose a selection from the novel about the family’s trip to institutionalize the “imbecile” brother, Georgie. As he read this passage, tears rolled down my checks. I was caught in the same moment in time, as a younger me, watching Rain Man. The scene that I remember the most vividly from that movie is the one where a childhood photo of the brothers is lost in a motel room bathtub.
Both these scenes discuss the feeling of loss that happens when a disabled sibling is put away, or kept away from us. In the novel, its the point when Augie kisses his childhood goodbye.
I think back at these scenes, and see what motivates me, what I’m working towards. I guess that I always believed that if I worked hard enough, I could somehow save my sister from the same fate. I must keep my fingers crossed, and hope that I accomplish this.