No one has ever accused the Dowbrigade of being just another pretty We were even more interested considering that this year, four of the five finalists were The answer, in the humble opinion of the Dowbrigade, is yes on both At the same time, the pageant itself is obviously influenced by the Quite simply, beauty and sex capture eyeballs and sell products. Back There were long wires tipped in slippery silvery electrodes, used to We are absolutely sure that the mega-corporations that sponsor the Miss The search for physical beauty is an endless and lucrative motor for But the times they are achangin’. In place of the Corporate Education The BU Corporate Training Center had been replaced with the BU Cosmetic We wonder where they moved the computer geeks to. Somewhere out Miss Universe article from the Moscow Times<\/a><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Five finalists of the Miss Universe 2005 contest pose on the stage at the final round at Impact Arena in Bangkok, Thailand Tuesday, May 31, 2005. They are from left, Miss Mexico Laura Elizondo Erhard, Miss Puerto Rico Cynthia Olavarria, … Continue reading ![](\"http:\/\/dowbrigade.com\/images\/finaallists.jpg\")
Five
\n finalists of the Miss
\n Universe 2005 <\/a>contest pose on the stage at the
\n final round at Impact Arena in Bangkok, Thailand Tuesday, May 31, 2005.
\n They are from left, Miss Mexico Laura Elizondo Erhard, Miss Puerto Rico
\n Cynthia Olavarria, Miss
\n Dominican Repubublic Renata Sone, Miss Canada Natalie Glebova and Miss
\n Venezuela Monica Spear. (AP Photo\/Rungroj Yongrit, Pool)<\/em><\/p>\n
\n face, although we do consider ourself a lover of beauty. After attending
\n the
\n Miss Universe event
\n last year<\/a> in Quito, Ecuador, it was inevitable that we would follow
\n the current edition, just completed in Bangkok, Thailand, another city
\n of which we have many fond memories.<\/p>\n
\n from Latin America, which only accounts for about 5% of the planets population.
\n The question came up in class today: Does Latin America really contain
\n a predominance of the most beautiful women in the world, or is the Miss
\n Universe pageant somehow fixed, or influenced by the nation origins of
\n the judges or sponsors?<\/p>\n
\n counts. Obviously, we agree that the most beautiful women in the world
\n are from Latin America, having married two of them. Not only are they
\n exquisite, they are smart, athletic, and empowered, without having
\n sacrificed any of their femininity.<\/p>\n
\n standards of beauty in the countries that fund it, and by the comparative
\n purchasing power of the millions of viewers that actually sit through
\n the thing on live television. This year’s winner, Miss Canada, was born
\n in Russia. It is also interesting to note that of the 3 North American
\n countries, two were among the five finalists. Last year in Quito<\/a>,
\n Miss Australia took home the top prize. Not only the Miss
\n Universe
\n pageant,
\n but ultimately
\n all of our public images of female perfection are provided by advertisers
\n and marketing professionals.<\/p>\n
\n in college, one of the Dowbrigade’s fields of study was Psychophysiology,
\n the relation between the human brain and body. We got to mess around
\n in a lab with all sorts of mad-scientist gear, used to measure just about
\n every parameter of human physical response you can imagine.<\/p>\n
\n measure everything from Galvanized Skin Resistance (sweat, basically,
\n used in lie detectors) to electrical responses in the heart and brain
\n (electrocardiogram and encephlograms), to beams of light that reflected
\n on the eyeball to record where a subject is looking, cameras to record pupil dilation, BP cuffs, vacuum bags to measure and analyze respiration,
\n and
\n tons more cool toys; But our favorite was the penometer, a wired, smoking-jacket-like
\n sheath which enclosed the male member and measured its degree of engorgement
\n while the subject was submitted to various stimuli.<\/p>\n
\n Universe pageant have run extensive tests with male and female subjects
\n from a variety of high-income, high beauty-pagent-viewership nations,
\n using the Penometer and whatever is its female equivalent, to determine
\n in an objective way what is the most stimulating standard of physical
\n beauty available within the strict limits of permissible public broadcast
\n established by the FCC. Apparently, according to the latest test groups,
\n Latinas are hot.<\/p>\n
\n the world economy and permeates all aspects of our culture and society. For
\n the past several months, for example, we have noticed something different
\n on the area of Commonwealth Avenue on the college campus where our office
\n is located.<\/p>\n![](\"http:\/\/dowbrigade.com\/images\/bucec.gif\")
Last week
\n we finally figured it out. Gone from #930 was the Boston University Corporate Education
\n Center<\/a>, which for the past decade has trained IT
\n geeks for major Boston business, and was, we thought, a promising new-wave
\n revenue stream pointing toward an attractive avenue of future development. Cheesy
\n and crassly commercial, but a sign of the times.<\/p>\n
\n Center was the following sign:<\/p>\n![](\"http:\/\/dowbrigade.com\/images\/beauuty.jpg\")
<\/p>\n
\n Surgery Salon<\/a>! Wow! Who knew that BU has it own Cosmo Center? Note
\n that this is not a center to learn<\/em> about or how to do cosmetic
\n surgery. It
\n is a clinic offering these services to students and members of the community!
\n We
\n imagine they
\n are making this a major point in their pitch to the archetypical BU student,
\n the Jewish American Princesses of Long Island: "And for one, low price
\n of $60,000 we include a year’s tuition, a boob or nose job, and two other
\n elective surgeries of your choice."<\/p>\n![](\"http:\/\/dowbrigade.com\/images\/geenaa.jpg\")
We must
\n admit, however, that the one area in which BU surpasses its cross-river
\n rivals is in the delectability of those members of its community
\n colloquially know, in the past, as co-eds. Castigate our crude chauvinism
\n if you must, but BU women are much hotter than those at Harvard or MIT. Why
\n this should be remains a mystery, but for examples one need look no further
\n than BU graduate Geena Davis, soon to reappear as President
\n of the United States<\/a>, but in our mind forever enshrined, together
\n with Samuel L. Jackson, in
\n that classic of American cinematography, "The
\n Long Kiss Goodnight<\/a>."
\n She remains, in our mind at least, as the premiere kick-ass female action hero,
\n above pretenders like Sigourney Waver or Angelina Jolie.<\/p>\n
\n of sight, obviously, although we are sure they would have been willing
\n to collaborate with Advancing the Science of Beauty.<\/p>\n