{"id":2088,"date":"2004-02-13T20:16:41","date_gmt":"2004-02-14T00:16:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.law.harvard.edu\/dbnews\/2004\/02\/13\/dowbrigade-headlines-2035\/"},"modified":"2004-02-13T20:16:41","modified_gmt":"2004-02-14T00:16:41","slug":"dowbrigade-headlines-2035","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/2004\/02\/13\/dowbrigade-headlines-2035\/","title":{"rendered":"Dowbrigade Headlines, 2035"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a name='a2641'><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh-largest country in the world -the Republic of California<\/p>\n<p>White minorities still trying to have English recognized as the third official language in the Republic of California<\/p>\n<p>Baby conceived naturally &#8211; Scientists stumped<\/p>\n<p>Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Iraq, Afganistan, Sryia and Lebanon<\/p>\n<p>Castro finally dies at 112, Cuban cigars can now be legally imported, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all tobacco smoking anywhere<\/p>\n<p>George Z. Bush announces he will oppose Clinton in &#8217;36<\/p>\n<p>US Postal Service raises price of First Class stamp to $18.75 and reduces mail delivery to once a week<\/p>\n<p>Massachusetts executes last remaining Conservative<\/p>\n<p>Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their human rights<\/p>\n<p>Average height of NBA players reaches 7 feet 11 inches &#8211; average salary now $2.3 billion<\/p>\n<p>Mormon&#8217;s protest FAA requirement than only transparent &#8220;Flight Jammies&#8221; be worn on commercial flights<\/p>\n<p>IRS sets lowest tax rate at 73%<\/p>\n<p>2036 Superbowl to be played on Mars &#8211; Halftime show to feature Nude Figure Skating on Martian Canals<\/p>\n<p>(adapted form an anonymous list posted over the copy machine at work)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh-largest country in the world -the Republic of California White minorities still trying to have English recognized as the third official language in the Republic of California Baby conceived naturally &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/2004\/02\/13\/dowbrigade-headlines-2035\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":299,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1443],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2088","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-esl-links"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2088","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/299"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2088"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2088\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2088"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2088"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/archive.blogs.harvard.edu\/dowbrigade\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2088"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}